I don’t deserve….

For about the last week or so, James Fortune & Fiya’s 2008 release, The Transformation, has been blasting in my car. There are a few tracks that are very catch and a few others that speak to where I am mentally and spiritually in my walk with Christ. The first track is title I Owe All featuring Anaysha Figueroa.

The song starts out a little slow but quickly speaks to your spirit. The chorus of the song says “I owe it all, all in worship to You. I don’t deserve all the things that you do.” To me that says it all. This is a song for a true worshiper. In my heart I am a worshiper. I live and I breathe to worship my God in spirit and in truth. He is truly my everything. Those that know me personally knows this to be true. A worship experience with me is like none other.

I now that I’m not perfect. I’ve missed the mark on several occasions and I know that I may mess up again before He calls me home. Now, I’m not saying that I plan to messed up again but the reality is that I’m still human and the possibility of making a mistake is there. But the blessing, the honor, and the mercy that God continues to pour on me and my life is amazing. And I don’t ever want a minute to go by that I don’t express my gratitude to the Father.

The last two years of my life have truly been a trying time. I lost my marriage, a host of friends (some had worn out there welcome…lol), and I almost lost my mine. The devil tried to convince me that God didn’t love me and the grass really was greener on the other side. But God continued to keep me. He blessed me to release my first book, Long distance Relations. He’s given me a brand new start in life with a relocation in the middle of the worst recession my generation has ever seen. And he’s blessed me to be in a financial position to get line to make the move to walk into my calling to full time ministry in the very near future. So, yes, “I owe it all, all in worship to You. I don’t deserve all the things that you do.”

I truly do not deserve any of this that He has given me. I have declared at one point that I was done with church and church people. I even went as far as saying I don’t want nothing else to do with God. But God knew my heart and that I was talking out of anger. But his grace is sufficient and His mercy is everlasting.

Check out this song! I’m sure it will open up your eyes too.


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